Sometimes you just need to wear some nice clothes
Even if they're less comfortable than LA gear jogging bottoms
I have an anecdotal theory that whatever we were all doing 5 years ago as the pandemic hit, we now have intense desires to do the exact opposite.
Those who were constantly on-the-go and dressing up even to do the grocery shop have switched to ‘loungewear’ and hybrid working. There is a certain amount of discourse online from those whose party habits I would once have been jealous of, now proclaiming they reject any outing that is proposed to be still ongoing after 10pm.
I am, however, somewhat the opposite. Having chosen to become self-employed - mainly working from home - in 2018, the pandemic caused me to become acutely aware of its downsides. It turns out, for me at least, that rolling out of bed into some LA gear jogging bottoms (I like the waistband, but they are the most visually unflattering trousers you could imagine) and shuffling into a chair at the bottom of your bedroom, waiting for the familiar start-up bong of your iMac as you tell Alexa to play LBC, can actually get tiresome.
When the highlight of your day becomes moving from one room to another, or having a walk up and down the garden because you’re too tired from work to go out for anything more, you can easily start to lose track of who you actually are.
I am the first person to extoll the benefits of flexible working and self-employment, and I believe everyone should have the option to work from home if it is viable. The fact is though, when I worked in an office full-time, I made an effort to dress in clothes I liked. To do my hair in new styles, and try out new make-up. I bought new things, ate new food and sometimes just spent my lunchtimes browsing shops. I felt more in touch with the world, with my city and what was happening in it.
Working entirely from home amidst the trauma of the pandemic caused me to forget some parts of my identity. Who actually was I now? What did I like doing? What clothes would I wear if I left the house? Did I still like my hair blonde? Could I remember how to blend my eyeshadow?
All of these factors were of considerable influence when I chose to update my computer from desktop to laptop. It’s why my studio upgrade, which I have been waxing lyrical about on social media and this very newsletter for months, is so important to my wellbeing and not just my career.
Now, I can sit here typing this on a desk that is not my own. In a room with different lighting. Wearing jeans as the summer breeze floats softly through a nearby fire door, the smell of coffee beans complimenting my experience.
Sometimes, you need change. That change for some was to become more acquainted with their homes and the people around them. To spend more time indoors appreciating what they had, to live smaller and more consciously. For me, it is to leave my house - just for myself - a little more often.
To take pride in Emma and not just emzae. To take steps to remember who I am outside of the cage my routine had become. That, in turn, will lead to more interesting and rewarding creative work.
It’s a process of trial and error, but today as I listened to the conversations of strangers and the sound of spoons clinking against coffee cups, this piece flowed out of me.
emzae x
Stuff I am enjoying right now:
Times Like These - Addison Rae
My name is Julian and when I go out I wear suits